Forgiveness
«But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses» (Mark 1 1:26).
Mario had decided to forgive a friend who had distanced himself from the family which really hurt them. Even if he had planned to do it, every time he met the friend, he would remember the harm he had done. Instead of showing him his willingness to solve the problem, he became more disturbed. Worse yet, his bitterness had affected his relationship with his friend’s close family and friends. «Why is this happening to me?» he wondered. «If I want to forgive, what can I do to change the situation? He felt even worse when he meditated on verses such as the one from today which addresses forgiveness between brothers in order to receive God’s forgiveness.
A person, place, or memory can act as stimuli that are capable of activating an entire neural network. When a neural network is activated, it promotes a series of thoughts, emotions and feelings that are difficult to stop. Simultaneously, there are behavioral and physiological changes that are linked to the memory which strengthens the connections in the neural networks. Once the framework is mapped out, it will remain latent until the next stimulation. How then do you stop this flood of memories? How do you stop feeling apprehensive and mistrustful? The secret consists in resisting the thoughts and feelings related to the delineated negative network and generating a new network created on the same stimuli but based on forgiveness.
In other words, Mario had to resist any desire of accusation or justification and, instead expressed his desire to forgive, forget or even help his friend, if needed. It is possible to create new connections through words or actions based on voluntary decisions, encouraging a new flow of thoughts and feelings. Thus, when he meets his friend, he will have two options in the neural repertoire: the one that causes you discomfort and unhappiness or the one where forgiveness paves the way for reconciliation. Every time he exposes himself to the stimuli that evoke the wound, he will have to stop the flow of his thoughts and redirect them toward the new direction required by God. «The real greatness and nobility of the man is measured by the power of the feelings that he subdues, not by the power of the feelings that subdue him. The strongest man is he, who, while sensitive to abuse, will yet restrain passion and forgive his enemies.» (Testimonies for the Church, vol. 4, ch. 64, p. 656).
«He has shown you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?» (Mic. 6:8). If He asks for it, He will also help you to fulfill it.
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Taken from: Daily Devotions for Adults 2020
“A Cheerful Heart Is Good Medicine”
From: Julian Melgoza-Laura Fidanza
Colaboradores: Alejandra Zavala & Magda Sanz
