Q: I’m fourteen, and I’ve been writing to lots of girls for a couple years, but now I want to stop writing to some of them. The problem: I don’t want to hurt any of their feelings. Can I stop writing to them and yet not be rude?
About a month ago I wrote a letter to one girl and mentioned I was writing to some other girls. When she wrote back, she called me a rude name. She comes from a divorced family.
A: First of all, yes, I think you can stop writing to some of the girls and not be rude. I’ve found it works best to be honest and straightforward with people. Tactfully explain why you can no longer write as much. If you’re open and direct, yet gentle and sensitive, my hunch is they’ll understand.
The girl who became angry because she discovered you were writing to other girls strikes me as being possessive of you. She is uncomfortable with you developing other friendships with girls because she probably fears you will opt for other friends and leave her hanging (and hurting). The fact that she comes from a divorced family tells me that she has seen abandonment and rejection firsthand. That helps me understand why she would respond to you in a possessive manner.
I don’t see any problem with continuing to write her. Like my dad used to tell me—have lots of friends.
Karl Haffner
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Tomado de: Daily Devotions for Junior 2020
“Eyes of the Crocodile”
From: Charles Mills
Colaboradores: Javier Gadea & Alessandra Maya
