«Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect» (Romans 12:2, NLT).
There is something within each of us that makes us look for patterns, connecting events to make sense of them. As if life were one of those drawings where you have to connect the dots, we trace connecting lines between what people say and what they think, between events that are out of our control and God’s will. Even when we look at the stars in the sky, we connect dots by drawing constellations: the Southern Cross, the Great Bear, Orion’s Sword. . . Our desire to find meaning in what happens to us plays an important role. However, like impatient children, we sometimes connect the dots the wrong way. Then, instead of ending up with a beautiful drawing of a bear, we end up with a far from understandable mess.
Your coworkers go out to lunch, but they do not invite you. How do you interpret that? If you spend lunchtime wondering what they have against you, when they come back it is very likely you will treat them disdainfully. Then, what might have been a simple oversight, without bad intentions, becomes real distancing. Your husband forgets to take out the trash again. How do you connect the dots? If you decide it means he does not care about you and is hopelessly selfish, you will probably end up having a fight. Our interpretations modify our behavior and can generate self-fulfilling prophecies! It is important to remember that, although we can see actions, we cannot see other people’s motivations.
«Only God knows what other people think,» writes Gery Scazzero in The Emotionally Healthy Woman. «However, we often play we are God when we assume things about others, or interpret a behavior without checking the facts. Those assumptions bring a lot of unnecessary pain and confusion.» Since we cannot read other people’s minds, unless we ask them or verify the facts, we will end up with a scribble.
Lord, please give me the patience and wisdom I need so as to not jump to hasty conclusions. I need humility to ask and check facts, adequately and at the right time, and that way make sure I have the right perspective. Only You know other people’s secrets and motives. Give me the caution and humility to avoid unnecessary quarrels. Amen.
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Take From: Devotional Thoughts for Women 2022
«NO FEARS»
BY: VANEZA PISSUTO
Collaborators: Alexandra Pérez & Angelica Cuate.
